 Matt was somewhere between breaking down and crying like a 1 captainstabbin full minute girl, and head butting something until 1fullmikeinbrazilminute his brains oozed out his ears, or the immovable 1fullmikeinbrazilminute object became minute movable. Maybe having a few drinks to talk full whatever was bothering him 1fullmikeinbrazilminute over 1 wasn't the brightest idea full Bill had ever had. At least 1 in a public place someone might step in before Matt did something to him that couldn't be fixed surgically. Bill made a mental note: Big guy plus drinks plus distraught equals bad. Bill looked around; the place had gone almost 1 dead quiet (like in one of those stock tip commercials), which 1fullmikeinbrazilminute was amazing for a bar full on image a Saturday 1 night.
 "My fault, my fault," Matt sobbed. "All my 1fullmikeinbrazilminute freakin fault." Bill tried not to 1 make too much of his friends 1 borderline mental meltdown, tried to play it cool, not notice, as much for his friends sake 1 as for 1 captainstabbin full minute the benefit of the captainstabbin looming bouncer. He gestured for the waitress 1fullmikeinbrazilminute, who 1fullmikeinbrazilminute quite reasonably looked 1 dubiously to the 1fullmikeinbrazilminute bouncer for some kind 1 of 1 captainstabbin full minute instructions. Serve? Don't serve? Bill threw her his best "we'll be good, my friends had a bad day, please please, pretty please" look. She checked the bouncer who frowned thoughtfully 1, then gave a indefinite "go ahead 1 captainstabbin full minute but proceed cautiously 1fullmikeinbrazilminute" nod. She took their order and scurried away out of the danger zone.
 "Anyway. What was your fault?"
 Bill nodded he understood and waited for Matt to open 1 up. For what seemed like forever Matt just sat there.
 "Tina...?" Bill 1fullmikeinbrazilminute prodded.
 "And this minute game is somehow the reason she left?" Bill asked, trying desperately to find out SOMETHING useful.
 "Ok Matt," Bill tried 1fullmikeinbrazilminute again, "We need captainstabbin to start pulling these captainstabbin facts together now full so minute I can 1fullmikeinbrazilminute understand. I wasn 1't there so I need you to fill in a little more detail. Chunky Monkey's, hypnosis, and 1 Tina's disappearance all are related how?"
 "It's the Chunky Monkey's fault, and mine." That wasn't helpful.
 "No. For 1fullmikeinbrazilminute her. She's anything but, she's beautiful, but that's what she had me call her. "
 Bill was wondering where that full damned waitress had went. He was wishing he'd ordered something stronger 1.
 "She'll belong to the first guy who tells 1 her to 1 do something." Matt screamed, no longer caring who heard. "She 1fullmikeinbrazilminute'll be his slave forever. Do you get image it? Freakin forever. Unless she 1 just HAPPENS to wanders into 1 captainstabbin full minute another ice cream place with that flavor first. Oh God help me, it's my fault. All my fault."
 Bill didn't 1fullmikeinbrazilminute have time to react or 1 respond. The bouncer 1 had heard enough. Two nuts, curb service, no waiting. The 1fullmikeinbrazilminute bouncer manhandled the pair of them easily 1fullmikeinbrazilminute. Matt, although a large man himself was in no state to resist, and Bill was 5'6" and barely a 1 handful.
 "She won 1't," Matt sobbed uncontrollably 1fullmikeinbrazilminute. "She won't."
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